Relationships as told by a computer program.

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You are not registered, please purchase dinner and movie.

Success!  Loading...

Relationship 2.0 does not allow third party "Relationship" add-ons.  Do you accept?

Success!

Welcome to Relationship 2.0!  All new users must run "talking" script, do you wish to continue?

Limited privileges set.

Have you run this program before?

How many programs have crashed before running Relationship 2.0?

... 

Would you like to run "sleep with phone" script?

Adorable privileges set.

Logging out of Relationship 2.0.

A couple of days pass.

Welcome to Relationship 2.0!  You have not run this program in two days, do you wish to continue?

Relieved privileges set.

Would you like to run "date" script?

Running date script...

...

The system has encountered an awkward error, close program?

Program not closed, attempting to fix error...

Success!

Would you like to run "back to my place" script?

Running script...

...

Retrying...

Applying alcohol patch...

Retrying...

Success!

Would you like to run "make-out" script?

Running script...

...

This program has encountered an unexpected boner error, do you wish to close program?

Program not closed, running humorous sexual joke utility...

Success!

Relationship 2.0 is trying to run "oral pleasure" script.  By agreeing to run this script, the user is agreeing to engage in auto-run, continue?

Contin-

The program has encountered an embarrassing orgasm, halting script.  Would you like to close program?

Program not closed, running doesn't happen often utility.

Uncomfortable privileges set.

Logging out of Relationship 2.0.

The next day.

Welcome to Relationship 2.0!  The user's last session encountered embarrassing orgasm, if this happens again the program will automatically close and user must register with another copy of Relationship 2.0.  Do you agree?

Continuing...

Would you like to run "apartment lunch" script?

Running script...

Relationship 2.0 is trying to run "early dessert" script but noticed the user has not purchased and applied condom patch, by running older pull out utility the user is more prone to unexpected errors.  Continue?

Continuing.  Running script...

Success!

Would you like to run "fall asleep" script?

Denied.

Would you like to run "cuddle" script?

Running script.

Falling For privileges set.

Logging out.

A few weeks of regular use later.

Welcome to Relationship 2.0!  ERROR 708:  The program has encountered an unexpected pregnancy error.  Would you like to abort?